Yeah… I know! :person_facepalming:
OMG, that’s so funny, haha! 
(really glad to see your signature again :partying_face: )
We aim to please! 
What do you call it when everyone at work is sick?
…Staff infection.
A guy sees his doctor…
“Doc, you gotta help me. I got these songs running over and over through my head. Over and over, to the point where I can’t even think straight. I even end up humming them to myself. I can’t sleep! It’s exasperating!”
“Interesting… what songs are they?”
“A bunch… Delilah… What’s New Pussycat… Thunderball…”
“Ah! You must have Tom Jones Syndrome!”
“Never heard of that. Is it rare?”
“It’s Not Unusual…”
Wife asks programmer husband to go to store and buy a loaf of bread.
Then she adds, “If they have eggs, get a dozen”.
Husband comes home with 12 loaves.
Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?
Great food, but no atmosphere.
God almost reaches the bottom of the bag of things to give to Adam and Eve.
He pulls out a piece of paper, “peeing standing up”
Adam: “oh God, give that to me, really I should have this”
Eve shrugs: “if it is so important to him, give it to him”
“And so it shall be from this moment onwards” proclaims God
And he reaches in the bag.
“Last one left, since Adam got peeing standing up, this one is for Eve”
He pulls it out and reads “being able to have multiple orgasms”
Yeah, totally not fair. :laughing:
Found on GearBest.
See the blue box.
lol, needs resize for all mobile users to see it too:
Dear Gearbest. I recently purchased a Haikelite MT01 MT-G2. It’s broken. Light flickers on turbo mode. I’ve included a video. Please scroll down to “Six Brightness Levels” for demonstration.
Yup, it's busted!
Maybe it’s so bright that the voltage sagged and its low-voltage blink kicked in.
If this were combined with a Uranusfire it would become a potent long range weapon…
Huh
I have tested such job on my laptop
Sorry that multiple personality disorder.
found this
“And YES, I FREAKING KNOW THAT SCHIZOPHRENIA IS NOT THE SAME AS MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER, OKAY? But it’s a longstanding common misconception that it is, and in everyday humour, the two are taken to be the same. THIS IS NOT JUST ME; check out these jokes:
I’m schizophrenic and so am I.
National Schizophrenic’s Convention: Anybody who’s everybody will be there!
If a schizophrenic threatens suicide, is it declared a hostage situation?
I may be schizophrenic but at least I have each other.
Paranoid schizophrenic: Are you staring at us?
Hell, one blogger even started a collection of schizophrenic jokes. Here’s a sample:
I’ve half a mind to go to that meeting on schizophrenia tonight.
When is a man two men? When he is beside himself.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I’m schizophrenic, and so am I.
I’m in two minds about that joke.
Woman: Will you still respect me in the morning?
Man: I’ve never respected you.