The Daily Joke Thread

A pear.

A co-worker got sick and tired of people asking him where Ed is. So, he got creative.

LINK

Funny, but when a cow-orker and I were sitting right outside the boss’s office, people treated us (mainly him, ’cause he was right outside her door) like the receptionist or secretary.

"Do you know where X is?"

"Can you tell X to call me when she gets back?"

"Do you know when X will be back?"

ad nauseam.

He made up a rather large poster, listing things like

No, I don't know where X is.

I have no idea when X will be back.

Sorry, I can't take messages for X.

and on, and on, a full page’s worth.

X thought it was funny, but “coincidentally” a week or two later when the COO stopped by, the COO read it, got a chuckle, but it was taken down within hours.

Funny how close that scenario is to the original one. XO staff with no humor… not a fun place to work.

Geologic Time

"Ok, well, we'll be sure to pay you sometime soon, geologically speaking."

one big difference between men and women is that
if a woman says “Smell this!”
it usually smells nice

Two old men are sitting on a bench in the park.

A: My youngest grand daughter told me she has a new job.
B: Nice, where is it?
A: In a message parlor.
B: And does it make good money?
A: Depends on how the message is delevered, by hand or by mouth.
B: Ah, a Sing-A-Gram.

I saw this on gamefaqs.gamespot.com today...

I thought it was pretty ingenious.

Went to the local zoo today, they only had 1 dog.
It was a Shih Tzu

Dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Old man goes to his doctor…

“Doc, I got a problem. Every morning I have a bowel movement at 6:30, just like clockwork.”

Doc asks, “Hm? Why’s that a problem?”.

Old guy replies, “I don’t get out of bed ’til 8.”.

That one belongs in the same place as the shih tzu…. :wink:

You should make this a poll here at BLF, so we can see which poll answer is most popular among flashaholics.

Nice To E-Meet You

I'm inside your head and I hate it. Please let me out.

Went for a drive today and all these people were standing around in this paddock. On the way home they were still there, I thought to myself that must be a vacant lot.

Not only Friday the 13th, but also a Full Moon today! :smiling_imp:

Abridged version:

have you heard the one about the skunk?
never mind, it stinks