The Daily Joke Thread

Q: Daddy, is 4 a little or a lot?
A: It depends son. 4 dollars is not much, but 4 Chinese coughs is a lot

1 word joke

BREXIT

ok, there is a special sort of really stupid jockes. i dont know if there is similar in other coutries. But there is one, well known among russian-speaking.

the bear walked through the forest and saw a burning car. climbed into it and burned.

this one is so popular, there are bunch of memes about it. i`ve just even fount t-shirt based on it.

How much space will Brexit free up in the European Union?

1 GB.

:+1:


With a resolution to match! :laughing:

Props!

Takes me at least 14 cups to do that.

The cops at my door asked me where I was between 5 and 6 .

They took me downtown for more questioning

when I told them kindergarten

Hey what did you expect? We were investigating a flasher complaint :cowboy_hat_face:

Speaking of which…

Burning bears is unbearable humor. Smoky would
Not be amused. :email:

So, the 2 Irishmen, Paddy and Shamus, are walking home from the pub. Paddy stops and says,“Shamus, I’ve got to have a piss.” Shamus says “what the hell Paddy,it looks like ye got a steerin wheel wrapped around yer pecker there! Paddy says ” I know! It’s drivin me nuts!”

Wheel funny.

Coronavirus Name

It's important to keep the spider from touching your face.

What does an eighty-year old woman taste like?

Depends

The Mexican word for the day is : Chicken strip
“My girlfriend can’t dance to well
but chicken strip!”

A bit like the one before. It’s an oldie from a magazine.

Spaceship lands in a park. Next to a pond with swans.
An alien steps out and says to the biggest swan: “take me to your Leda”.

Scientific Briefing

I actually came in in the middle so I don't know which topic we're briefing on; the same slides work for like half of them.