Similar theme:
she: Does this dress make me look fat?
he: Nope, your fat makes you look fat.
Her trial starts next week.
Similar theme:
she: Does this dress make me look fat?
he: Nope, your fat makes you look fat.
Her trial starts next week.
she: “Does this dress make me look fat?”
he: “I love you and I want you to look and feel your best. And I don’t
think that particular dress compliments you well. Let’s find something that hides those big love handles.”
(and he started off so well….)
Joe Biden said a few months ago that he’s going to pick a woman as his running mate. In recent weeks some people are saying that he should pick a black woman. Elizabeth Warren is now scrambling to fill out the proper forms. She’s also going to send her spit in for DNA testing again.
Do you know why stealing from cashiers is easy, it’s because most of them don’t know or weren’t pefectly trained to jump over the cash desk counter
I needed clean work clothes for this week, so I washed a load of pajamas.
Wrong Times Table
I so seriously don’t get it.
I think the fact that someone would actually make a times table that is completely wrong is pretty funny.
(I like stupid math jokes.)
Everyone has heard that pi are not squared, they are round.
Wellp, I gotta admit, that certainly qualified.
We had a goofy teacher who used to “correct” the kids who said ” 2 pi R squared” he’d say “No cake are square pi are round”.
Nope, cornbread r squared, cake r round.
I knew Yogi had a big ol’ mean-streak…
Worse, he’s an angry drunk.
Especially after he was jailed for beating BooBoo into a coma.
Sad day…
A Freudian Slip is when you say one thing, but you mean your mother.
Did you hear that the guy who wrote the hokey pokey song recently died? They couldn’t close the casket at his funeral.
Because they put his left foot in , he put his right foot out
Low-Background Metal
The only effect on the history books were a few confusing accounts of something called 'Greek fire.'