Challenge: most ridiculous advertised lumens (current record 99.9 trillion lumens)

[zoulas]

The only thing better than 8 minute abs is 7 minute abs.

There's Something About Mary - 7 minute abs

[Lightbringer]

@Artiet59

That’s not bad, 999 billion lumens from a Xml-2 emitter… I’ll have to pick one up for taking out the trash at night.

Why bother? Just light it up and incinerate it in-place.

[Lightbringer]

@Th558

Well lucky for you, I’ve got just what you need…It also comes in 2 pcak so you get twice the output!

Amazing, too, the miracle of modern science…

They manage to squeak out “9999900000000LM” from a “Powerful 1200 Lumen LED”.

Mind = blown.

[zoulas]

Act now and we will double the offer. These prices are so low we are practically giving it away.

[klrman]

@dave1010

Good point. If you order this and it only looks like 99 million lumens then they probably tried to use up old stock and gave you last year’s model. You can double check with an integrating sphere: turn the flashlight on and point it at the sphere from 6ft and make sure the sphere has evaporated fully.

That's exactly why one has to be careful not to get fooled into buying old stock. We need to make the noobs aware of this so they don't get confused.

[klrman]

@Artiet59

That’s not bad, 999 billion lumens from a Xml-2 emitter… I’ll have to pick one up for taking out the trash at night.

Just shy of one trillion lumens, not good enough.

[dave1010]

Is flashlight technology stagnating? It’s been over 6 months and the industry still hasn’t broken past 10 trillion lumens in a flashlight.

[dave1010]

We have a new record!

99.9 Trillion Lumens for Only $9 ?!?!?!

I know, I know, I know…it’s a bullcrap claim. But, for $9 I was like, “Eh, why not?” [image] https://www.aliexpress.com/item/1005003287526726.html

@bigtrav261

99.9 Trillion Lumens for Only $9 ??!

[aginthelaw]

I think lumens is to them like yen is to the dollar

[Bwana]

Similar flashlight available on Amazon

$15.99 with Prime and an additional $5.00 off coupon .

https://www.amazon.com/USB-Rechargeable-LED-Flashlights-Lightweight/dp/B09B7KDWQX/ref=sr_1_296?keywords=flashlight&qid=1636910223&refinements=p_85%3A2470955011&rnid=2470954011&rps=1&sr=8-296

[Photon_Master]

Obviously this is a scam but I can’t help wondering what a 99 trillion lumen flashlight could do. Maybe something like the main gun on the Robotech SDF-1 or even the Grand Cannon

[dave1010]

If the 99 trillion lumens was a light bulb that spread out light evenly (unlike a flashlight that’s directional) then it would have an intensity of 8 trillion candela.

That’s a throw distance of 5600km. We’d need roughly 1 flashlight for each continent to light up the whole world.

I volunteer to be the flashlight holder for Europe.

[zoulas]

Don’t laugh, I would like to buy one to try. Is that their objective?

[Photon_Master]

@dave1010

If the 99 trillion lumens was a light bulb that spread out light evenly (unlike a flashlight that’s directional) then it would have an intensity of 8 trillion candela.

That’s a throw distance of 5600km. We’d need roughly 1 flashlight for each continent to light up the whole world.

I volunteer to be the flashlight holder for Europe.

Dude… that’s maybe the coolest thing I’ve ever heard. I’ll hold the flashlight for the US. Can I get one that focuses down to a beam 1 centimeter wide?

[Firelight2]

@dave1010

If the 99 trillion lumens was a light bulb that spread out light evenly (unlike a flashlight that’s directional) then it would have an intensity of 8 trillion candela.

That’s a throw distance of 5600km. We’d need roughly 1 flashlight for each continent to light up the whole world.

I volunteer to be the flashlight holder for Europe.

And if you were standing next to the LEDs that were producing 99.9 trillion lumens, the air would probably be hot enough to induce nuclear fusion.

[Bort]

@Firelight2

@dave1010

If the 99 trillion lumens was a light bulb that spread out light evenly (unlike a flashlight that’s directional) then it would have an intensity of 8 trillion candela.

That’s a throw distance of 5600km. We’d need roughly 1 flashlight for each continent to light up the whole world.

I volunteer to be the flashlight holder for Europe.

And if you were standing next to the LEDs that were producing 99.9 trillion lumens, the air would probably be hot enough to induce nuclear fusion.

Thats one way to solve climate change…

[dave1010]

Via Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/flashlight/comments/rid3fz/forget_the_1000000000_lumen_lights_this_is_the

High power flashlights are no longer measured in lumens as these are considered feeble and insignificant. If you want a proper flashlight then you check how many nuclear explosions they’re capable of.

[stephenk]

I think I’ll hold off for the 6 nuclear explosion 2022 version.

So how many lumens per nuclear explosion?

[Bort]

@stephenk

I think I’ll hold off for the 6 nuclear explosion 2022 version.

So how many lumens per nuclear explosion?

Well over 9000.

[LuxWad]

Anyone have some uranium and an integrating sphere several miles wide? We need to run some proper tests.