How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb?
How many redittors does it take to change a lightbulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.
17 purists who use candles and are offended by light bulb discussions.
6 to argue over whether it's 'lightbulb' or 'light bulb.'
Another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid.
22 to tell THOSE 6 to stop being jerks.
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is 'lamp.'
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that 'light bulb' is perfectly correct.
49 to post memes and gifs (several are of Michael Jackson eating popcorn).
19 to post that this page is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a light bulb page.
11 to defend the posting to this page saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant here.
24 to discuss the merits of LED/swirly fluorescent light bulbs.
44 to claim LED and fluorescent bulbs will kill you.
12 to post F.
8 to ask what F means.
36 People to post pics of their own light bulbs.
15 People to post "I can't see S$%^!" and use their own light bulbs.
6 to report the post or PM an admin because someone said "f÷×$"
4 to say "Didn't we go through this already a short time ago?".
13 to say "Do a search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs."
1 to bring politics into the discussion by adding that (insert politician of choice) isn't the brightest bulb. This usually takes place within the first three comments.
50 more to get into personal attacks over their political views.
5 admins to ban the light bulb posters who took it all too seriously.
1 late arrival to comment on the original post 6 months later and start it all over again.
Lightbringer and Boaz were on lushly forested nature hike together.
Boaz had his biggest high power multiple led lumen monster flash while Lightbringer brought his single led winky dinky mule flash.
Suddenly on the trail a huge black bear appears. On its hind legs his jaws snapping, his neck hairs standing on end.
Boaz instinctively holds down the side button to get full-turbo from his lumen monster and shines it right into the snarling bear’s eyes. Lightbringer just stood there and didn’t flinch.
The bear undeterred charges both hikers. Boaz and Lightbringer running as hard as they could neck and neck. From his galloping back Lightbringer somehow shines his mule flash into the bears eyes as he continues to haul a*s.
Boaz on the other hand is caught by the enraged bull bear and clawed down wherein his flash is bitten in half, laying there uselessly by his quivering side. Chunks of his scalp, Converse tennis shoes, and bloodied Speedos strewn all asunder. It’s an almost unimaginable scene.
The bear continues to rake Boaz stem to stern……
“Lightbringer, Gaw’d Almighty HELP ME!!!
By this time Lightbringer was a safe distance up the trail looking back upon the mayhem.
Then calmly he answered Boaz……almost in a whisper……
“How many times on these hikes did I tell ya that a bare led is better.”
PS. I didn’t make this one up. It’s been circulating for quite awhile on the Catskills stand up comedian circuit.
A middle-aged guy walks into a steamy public bath and is shocked to see the bubbly spa’s jammed full with only naked beautiful young women. Being natively shy since a boy he stood there at the edge fully clothed.
“Don’t be shy you can feel at ease! We all share something in common”, said one of the gorgeous young patrons with an alluring smile and wink. The other 14 stunning gals giggled nodding in agreement.
“You have to understand I wasn’t expecting THIS, ya know with just you gals here! I’ m in my mid forties!”
Being that he was the only male surrounded by such young beautiful naked women he thought,
“How many more unbelievable opportunities like this will come in my fading lifetime? How many more? None! That’s how many. None! Just do it”. And with that inner once-in-a lifetime convincement, he confidently disrobed proudly displaying his ample manhood, gingerly tip-toeing into the pool.
All the girls clapped, laughing, giggling, saying things like, “What a stud!”, “Atta boy!”, “You’re a hunk!”, “Oooooo la la”, “Yeaaaah baby!”
By now all shyness was completely gone. His confidence rock solid with it involuntarily beginning to show underwater.
Then he blurts out to break whatever initial tension was left within himself even further……
“So what is that ONE thing in common we share besides I’m a MAN surrounded by such beautiful women in a public bath!” he said with a hearty joyous laugh.
One of them answers,
“We’re transvestites.”
PS. Ya know it’s REALLY REALLY hard to come up with a good original joke. How do I know? I’ve yet to come up with one.
