raccoon city,
that make no sense
to us i we LOVE it.
more, please.
Average Familiarity
How could anyone consider themselves a well-rounded adult without a basic understanding of silicate geochemistry? Silicates are everywhere! It's hard to throw a rock without throwing one!
That’s some gritty humor there. 
Every Data Table
I'm hoping 2022 is relatively normal because I don't know what symbol comes after the asterisk and the dagger.
Double-dagger, ‡.
Joe is having his tires rotated at his local mechanic and noticed a sign that says “We can tell you exactly what is wrong with your car with just an oil sample from your car.” He thinks it is rubbish but decides to test it out. He goes home and decides to prank the auto mechanic to prove his theory. After filling a small bottle half full of oil he has his wife, son, and daughter pee in the bottle as well. He takes it back to the auto mechanic and waits ten minutes for the result. The mechanic comes back and tells joe , I’ve got some good news and some bad news for you. Your cars fine but your wife’s having an affair, your son’s on drugs, and your daughter’s pregnant!
Wally the Walrus is driving along in Nevada when his car starts smoking under the hood. He pulls up into the next service station and a mechanic starts looking at the car.
While the mechanic is looking at the car Wally is starting to feel a little dehydrated (being a marine mammal in a hot climate). He goes to the attached Convenience Store and gets an ice-cream bar to cool down.
Having only flippers to hold the bar it is messy but it cools him down. Cooler now he goes back to the mechanic, who looks at him and says “looks like you blew a seal”.
Wally replies “nah, it was just an ice-cream bar……”
And after that, machete.
Projecting
This is something we all need to work on, but especially you all.
A Chinese man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 2100 yuan and walked out with $300. The following week, he walked in with another 2100 yuan, and was handed $276. He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week. The teller said, “Fluctuations.” The Chinese man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, “Fluc you Amelicans, too!”
“I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes.
Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.”
“Flucuations”…classic. Had to share that with a few asians I work with. All thought it funny 
“Euthanasia”, fooey. What about Youth in America??
Ultra-Serial Violet C light is unpolarized, so you don’t have to flip the polarizing filter over when you get the orientation wrong the first time.
I want one!
A man was riding his Harley along a California highway, when suddenly the sky cleared above his head and in a booming voice, the Lord said:
“Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.”
The biker pulled over and said,
“Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.”
The Lord said,
“Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific, and the concrete and steel it would take!
It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind.”
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said,
“Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she’s thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing’s wrong, why she snaps and complains when I try to help, and how I can make a woman truly happy.”
The Lord paused for a moment……
Then the Lord replied,
“You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge?”
It’s too early for hurricane jokes
wait for everything to blow over first.
A hurricane tore off a quarter of my roof.
oof.
Where do squirrels go in a hurricane?
All over the place!
Sorry to hear you had damage . Good that all are safe .