questions:
1. what if UFO’s are just billionaires from other planets?
2. did you know you can get drunk on water as you can on land?
3. cna yuo raed tihs? azanmig, huh?
There are two ways of arguing with a woman.
.
.
Neither one works.
Did you hear about the chef who invented a new dish? He combined alphabet soup and a laxative.
.
.
It’s called, “Letter Rip.”
Do you know why you often hear birds singing in the morning?
.
It’s because they don’t have to go to work!
A guy wanted to save some money to buy a pound of marijuana. So he went to the bank and asked to open a joint account.
Post #2000!
(at the moment.)
“I like rice. Rice is great when you’re hungry and you want 2,000 of something.”
This… I like. 
I'm a news junkie, and for at least a week, the news in America has been all about 9/11, which is understandable.
I thought of this joke today...
I wonder how many Middle-Easterners have been treated poorly since 9/11/2001.
Thanks, Osama.
(Of course it's not completely Osama Bin Laden's fault, but it's just a joke.) 
An old-time author, whose name I can’t remember, had a character in one of his books named Lispin’ Sam. He was a ne’er do well, but one day he saved a child from drowning. The town was grateful and wanted to have a celebration in his honor. It embarrassed Sam, and he told them; “Aw, don’t make tho much of it…it’s the firtht decent thing I done thinth I robbed a lawyer!”
xevious…it is an old Mitch Hedberg joke.
here is another:
This shirt is dry clean only. Which means… it’s dirty.
lots more:
Mitch Hedberg was a strange guy. REALLy strange. I wonder if his style of comedy would’ve survived if he lived on… I still wonder at times if Steven Wright still tries to start his house with the car keys. 
Today I had some fun modifying an old Dr. Seuss book cover…
Paddy had long heard the stories of an amazing family tradition. It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 18th birthday.
On that special day, they’d each walked across the lake to the pub on the far side for their first legal drink.
So when Paddy’s 18th birthday came around, he and his pal Mick, took a boat out to the middle of the lake, Paddy, stepped out of the boat……and nearly drowned!
Mick just barely managed to pull him to safety. Furious and confused, Paddy went to see his grandmother .
“Grandma,” he asked, “Tis me 18th birthday, so why can’t I walk across the lake like me father, his father and his father before him?”
Granny looked deeply into Paddy’s, troubled blue eyes and said, “Because ye father, ye grandfather and ye great-grandfather were all born in December, when the lake is frozen, and ye were born in August, ya fookin idiot!”.
^ 
When I was very young I thought I had a Japanese friend...... But it was just my imagine Asian.
On the top of Mt. Fuji, a Japanese asked the local wise man: "Master Akira, why do western men think that we Japanese all look alike?"
" I am not Master Akira."
in my research of Baubo/Iambe jokes, i have found none.
lots references to the jokes, but not one actual joke.
if you know of one, please post it.
I don't know about Lamb jokes . But I do know a few lame ones ....
As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees a $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: "5 lamb chops, please."
Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth,and quickly closes the shop.
He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus-stop.
The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench.
When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus.
The butcher follows, dumbstruck.
As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery.
After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" bell,
then the butcher follows him off.
The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the step.
He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door.
He does this again and again. No answer.
So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door.
A big guy opens it and starts cursing and shouting at the dog.
The butcher runs up and screams at the guy: "What the hell are you doing?
This dog's a genius!"
The owner responds, "Genius, my ass.........
It's the second time this week he's forgotten his keys!"
He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus-stop.
The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench.
When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus.
The butcher follows, dumbstruck.
As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery.
After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" bell,
then the butcher follows him off.
The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the step.
He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door.
He does this again and again. No answer.
So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door.
A big guy opens it and starts cursing and shouting at the dog.
The butcher runs up and screams at the guy: "What the hell are you doing?
This dog's a genius!"
The owner responds, "Genius, my ass.........
It's the second time this week he's forgotten his keys!"
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A Rabbi ,a priest and a minister decide to go out into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. A few days later, the the priest and the minister bump into each other at the hospital, where each person is being treated for their particular injuries. They then tell each other about their experience.
The priest has a few minor bruises and injuries, and he starts by saying, "I did it! So I found a bear and started reading to it from the Catechism. However, he didn't seem to want to hear, and started attacking me. I sprinkled some holy water on him, and all of a sudden, he was there, tame as a lamb. We spent the rest of the afternoon reading from the bible."
The minister's injuries are a bit worse, with a sling on his arm and many scratches on his body. "I too succeeded in converting the bear. I read to him from the Holy Bible, but he didn't seem to want to hear it. He began fighting and wrestling me, and I managed to dunk his head in the river and baptize him, and he became tame as a lamb. We spent the rest of the afternoon praising Jesus."
As both of them were about to leave, they spot a gurney being wheeled to the emergency room. On it is the rabbi, who was in very bad shape. He had multiple broken bones, bite marks all over his body, and many nasty scratches. He then recognizes his friends and tells them, "Maybe I shouldn't have started with circumcision."
The priest has a few minor bruises and injuries, and he starts by saying, "I did it! So I found a bear and started reading to it from the Catechism. However, he didn't seem to want to hear, and started attacking me. I sprinkled some holy water on him, and all of a sudden, he was there, tame as a lamb. We spent the rest of the afternoon reading from the bible."
The minister's injuries are a bit worse, with a sling on his arm and many scratches on his body. "I too succeeded in converting the bear. I read to him from the Holy Bible, but he didn't seem to want to hear it. He began fighting and wrestling me, and I managed to dunk his head in the river and baptize him, and he became tame as a lamb. We spent the rest of the afternoon praising Jesus."
As both of them were about to leave, they spot a gurney being wheeled to the emergency room. On it is the rabbi, who was in very bad shape. He had multiple broken bones, bite marks all over his body, and many nasty scratches. He then recognizes his friends and tells them, "Maybe I shouldn't have started with circumcision."
Two sheep herders are flying the herd to a new farm. Suddenly, the engine fails and the plane begins to fall quickly to the ground.
“Quick! Grab a parachute and jump!,” said the first herder
“What about the sheep?”, said the second herder
“Screw the sheep!” the first herder replied
“Do you think we have time??”
Yes, it is funny. But I (am an Asian, too!) had to re-read the joke to figure out why the Chinese went out of the currency exchange shop and screamed the way he did.