**I’ve contemplated how special it tis’ to reach a 1,000 of these things. So special in fact that I think I’m gonna teeter on #999 for awhile. I wanna savor the cliff, feel the wind, masticate the wonder of it all in a pulpy mass.
This lets me accomplish three things btw….
1). It lets me avoid having to involuntarily gift something to somebody I might not even care for too much via random.org.
2). I’m a cheap bassturd and I like to put off anonymous gift-giving as long as possible. Especially if I don’t know ya and ya got lucky. What am I, Santa Claus?
3). It puts everything I respond to on one easy to find thread that for my purposes (and maybe even your’s) a one-shop stop for BLF info and other sundry items of notable interest that caught my attention to begin with. No longer will I have to dig through my account for threads I started but much now I also have an easy way to find all the posts I make on any subject even if I didn’t start the original thread. How cool is that? H) 8)
So henceforth until I deem so, or until a moderator boots me off here for unacceptable circumventing behaviour to the norm, I shall use this Post #999 to respond to whatever I see here that gets my attention. Or that I wanna bring to attention. Or whatever. It’s my potty and I’ll poop when I want to.
Now, with regards to the 1,000th post someday becoming reality, yes I have a plan for that.
If someone posts something so egregiously good, bad, insane, obnoxious, inaccurate, or just plain annoying so much so that it leaves me with no internal resistance but to respond directly to that OP’s thread, then I shall gift that OP whomever they may be a little custom-job accordingly. Like I said, a 1,000th post should be special. :bigsmile:
The deadline for this to happen is April 1, 2013. If it doesn’t happen by then, it ain’t happening. I’m prolly gone.
So this could happen tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, or anything in-between now and April 1, 2013.
To the Poster’s thread that gets me off my as* you deserve it. It’ll prolly be a good one.
I’ll be editing this thread a bit between now and then, or until told otherwise by a mod. I don’t know how this is gonna fly so it may all be moot.
And some of you think I’m a lunatic. 
12/21/12: In reply to Post #1. I will just edit this and it should show up as being updated to the top, no? Or am I more FOS than usual? And then anybody else could post to this will be the same thing. I dunno what am I missing? (Sh*t. This could be harder than I thought. I almost hit ‘reply’ due to some Pavlovian reaction no-doubt.) 
12/21/12: Btw, since Scaru’s at least as crazy as I am, all his projects are insane like this latest one. The boy just ain’t right, ya know what I mean? 8) He prolly won’t catch this ’cause being on the east coast I bet he’s asleep all curled up in a fetal position.
12/21/12: I changed the deadline to April 1, 2013. I think it’s more appropriate.
12/21/12: To ’That Ninja Guy’. I almost reply-voted “HELL YES!!!”. I nary blew-it all even before the nite was over. :party:
12/21/12: Btw something’s been bothering me around here and I have a question. Ya know how we have all these THROWER beamshot threads? How come I never see a FLOODER beamshot thread? Eh? How come? Ya know, how wide does a torch flood compared to another torch’s flood beamshot.
Which reminds me of something I was told by a very wise Cougar once…………….
She sed, “Any man can scrape bottom, it takes a real man to scrape the sides.”
12/21/12: In reply to Post #2. Yes, in theory that’s the insane plan.
12/21/12: With regards to Scaru’s pronouncement that Li-ions are pretty dang safe…… Li-ions are actually pretty safe...
I think if you f*ck around with them long enough they’re prolly not. Sorta like wall outlets, cactuses, cheap condoms, expired birth-control pills, mother-in-laws, etc. H)
12/21/12: In reply to Post #4. Hey thanks Orion for pointing that stubid error out! You’re one h*ll of a constellation here maybe outshone only by Pulsar13.
12/21/12: In reply to Post #5. Chigger, you have no-friggin’ idear how hard this is. It’s like a scratch ya can’t itch. Oh, and I better not drink while I’m doing this.
12/22/12: In reply to Post #3. Ah shoot, Gords. I got tied up by other things and she didn’t let me loose until this evening. I guess I’ll have to wait till your 2,000th comes around. :bigsmile: No besmirching your wonderful contributions here. Seriously. I always make it a point to read yer stuff. 8)
12/22/12: In reply to Post #8. Sorry, I’m afraid I’m gonna have to annoy ya just a little bit longer and more than usual, O-L! 
Hey btw, did Kreisler really do that? I dunno he prolly had a good reason. I think he’s pretty dam* smart ya know. Has a flashlight-mind like a 100TB encyclopedia. I think some folks should lighten-up about the Kreisler-man. He’s just likes to prankster around some. Nothin’ serious ya know what I mean? I like the guy. He’s gotta pair lemme tell ya.
12/22/12: In reply to Post #12. Already this is driving O-L crazy. He sees that ‘999’ up there like 3 bowling pins that must be knocked down!
12/22/12: I felt kinda e-Bay proud of myself yesterday. I outbid-scored 60ft of teflon 24awg silver-plated 19-strand for about $6 shipped!!! Woooo hooooo!!! Whatta cheap bassturd. And sneaky too. H) :nerd_face:
12/21/12: Btw, I’m glad all you guys survived The Mayan Day of the Dead Day. I was on the verge of bequeathing all my torches to a worthy cause like those magnificent apes who apparently will take over the earth here shortly.
12/22/12: Regarding this rather bizarre best chances for success procedure……. Reflector Cleaning?
I don’t have the b*lls to clean reflectors with my tongue. But I have to admit sometimes I wish my tongue could clean my b*lls though.
12/22/12: In reply to Post #15. Is that Ken after tranny surgery or Barbie going for the reversal?
12/22/12: In reply to Post #18. Scaru sed ……………“How’d ya guess. That’s basically what I was doing exactly then. However I’m gonna side with OL here, man the f*ck up! As the only person to say I was sorry to see you stop postng, I will personally send a light to who ever wins your damn giveaway. Or maybe I should just start one with out your permission.”
Well thar ya go folks it’s a wrap. On the record Scaru’s gonna match Lumatic’s giveaway. I mean it’ll prolly be a better match ‘cause I’m a cheap bassturd. And in any case if I were the recipient I’d wear lineman’s gloves handling any of his creations. Better safe than scorched. 
Now regardin’ to ‘man the f*ck up!’ mind ya this coming from a grown man wearin’ a size ‘XXXXXL’ diaper. Btw, I’m glad yer gonna miss me as much as ILF will. You two outta share Lumatic ‘I remember him when’ (sniff) stories.
12/22/12 In reply to Post #21. Speakin’ of nuts. Do ya know what ya just did how completely nutz this drives BOAZ? Pasting my entire post sends him over the top. I mean he’s gonna prolly have an apococalyptic fit. Or maybe not. He’s kinda fickle at times.
12/22/12: Since I was mentioned, in reply to this thread about flashlight storage………….
I store my few torches in drawers. Like those Craftsman tool chest dealies. Mine are modular-stacked about 6’ high now in the garage. I don’t keep the few torches that I have inside the residence, in curiooooooooooo cabinets, or the like. My torches are not Rikr-grade worthy stuff except maybe for a couple-dozen or so. I forget. Prolly a lot less. But anyway, the Missus would not appreciate me usurping her china dishware display of crap with stuff like that. If you’re married ya know we have our place and torches in the livingroom under glass competing against her’n taint one of em’. I really envy Rikr btw. What a stud. All I can say is, he really must be the rooster in that henhouse.
Oh btw storing batts properly is very important IMO. I get in particular mostly this plastic Storehouse case at Harbor Freight. I’ve found this one to be the best by far box-for-the-bucks. The removable dividers are almost perfectly spaced for 18650 and 26650’s too. The back hinges are on stoutly-built swivels instead of flexies - which as ya prolly know suk big time. This is a great batt case. Not too big, not too small. IOW great for handling (not too heavy) and space limitations. Backpackable too.
On sale goes for about only $2.00 with 20% coupon. In-store/on-line Sale right now goes through 1/31/13, IIRC.
What a bargain…………Thank me later, Gator. H)
http://www.harborfreight.com/18-divider-storage-container-94456.html
12/22/12: I don’t know why but I just remembered I dated a girl once who could tie a cherry stem into a tight knot with just her tongue. And when I say tight, I mean tight. It was amazing to watch her. Next thing ya know this cherry stem would pop out after about 30 seconds of very sexy suggestive mouth manueverings. Man, it was all I could do to keep it together. When ya find somebody like that, don’t lose her dude. I think I bought a lot of cherries back in those days.
12/22/12: In reply to Post #22. What O-L sed. “It’s the money, the more money you have………” Don’t have to repeat it but the man knows what he’s talkin’ about here. Pearls of wisdom. :bigsmile:
12/22/12: Sh*t. Modding’s fun. Until it goes haywire. Just sayin’…………
12/22/12: In reply to Post #23. Yes, I suppose I could delete posts but I think that would be cheatin’. Of course if I happen to mess-up and reply separately to somethin’ then I might cheat. H) Then again Scaru for sure would catch me doing it and make me pay up. So deleting ain’t gonna happen. Btw, most of the tiime the only thing that should truly distract a healthy male is the female form. So watch your in-front brake lights. Everything else most of the time is hardly worth consideration.
12/22/12: In reply to Post #28. Orion, WTH ya take me for some April Fool? 8) A ‘course I wouldn’t do that. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t. Stick around and find out. Oh and btw, put out a really good thread. Ya might win somethin’ cheap and useless for a change. :nerd_face:
12/22/12: In reply to Post #30. JacktheClipper was a fine limericker until he found out I was slicker. Hahahaha.
12/22/12: In reply to Post #31. Dream on. I hope a 6’ 9” Russian weight-lifter with steroid-rage moves into that barn and he hates flashlights.
12/22/12: In reply to Post #33. I dare ya. No, make that a double-dare ya. Go ahead. Try and impress me. Make it the Sippy68 shizz with an extension tube running 4 x 14500’s thru an XML2. You do that and ya might win somethin’. Oh, and it can’t get too hot to hold either after 30 minutes on high.
12/22/12: Wanna see the absolute best pair of scissors/shears or anything else ya can prolly buy for under $2? Or for that matter lot’s more than that?
Well here it is………
http://www.harborfreight.com/6-inch-utility-shears-67145.html
What a bargain. What amazing performance. With a 20% coupon absolutely unreal. They’re that good.
They may be made in China and cheap but they’re anything but in doing the deed beautifully-well.
Ya will hardly believe it until ya try a pair. Get some. Now while ya can.
Thank me later, Gator.
12/22/12: In reply to Post #34. I wunder if I can get a waiver seeing that I’m kind of a special case.
12/22/12: In defacto proxy reply to the request of this thread. 970 Post Giveaway
_“I’m a moron_”. Pay up, Sucker!!! BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA!! HA! HA!
Btw, WTH are these? I don’t think I want em’ even if they’re free. Give em’ to Scaru. He’ll fry anything.
12/23/12: In reply to this thread. 970 Post Giveaway
……and specifically Post #11.
How in the h*ll does he know I’ve been shtooping her? That’s outrageous. I can’t trust those dam* Disneyland midget Wizard of Oz bellhops any more even after tipping them 3 x HF 9-led flashies. Bassturds.
As far as hiring that diapered-agent’s concerned, you’re right it’s obvious I am getting desperate. His broker-fee tho’ is reasonable and besides in a pinch he really does know the diff between sh*t and shinola. :nerd_face:
Btw, anybody wanna bribe me with 15 flamed Mags I might consider coming back fulltime stubid……oh that and 500 XM-L’s in lieu of will be ok too I suppose. ILF OTOH I figure will give me a stick of dyna to get lost. I think he misses me like a syphlitic hemorrhoid. Btw, somebody tell him to tell those neighbors to move their dam* cars. It’s messin’ up his beamshots.
Other than that, bribery-wise
Toodles…………….
12/24/12: In reply to thread. calling lumatic
Hiya, Gords! May you and your’s have a wonderful Christmas and a faboo New Year’s better than ever than ever was!
x
And to all BLF’ers kvetching out there in that real virtual world, I wish the same. But ya gotta just remember when Lumatic’s not around, don’t try to be stubider ya big morons! :bigsmile:
12/24/12: In reply to Post #45. Yer wise, very wise. I wouldn’t trust me either to know where ya live. Just imagine the unspeakable terror if I showed up one nite on your doorstep with 15 A60’s I wanted to give ya. You’d prolly faint from the horror. The horror. :*
Colonel Kurtz over n’ out……………………
12/24/12: In reply to thread and Post #8. Are you happy that Lumatic won't be posting anymore?
Don’t be stubid ya big moron! If ya see Lumatic tied to anything avoid it at all costs! Don’t waste yer time. Especially if he buys somethin’ in bulk, or turns ya on to somethin’ he knows is a bargain :money_mouth_face: but good to have, or explains the subtle nuances of life to ya ’cause somebody else did a sh*tty job and ya still believe in Santa. 
H) Absolutely! Don’t be a moron! :weary: Avoid Lumatic and be happy. :bigsmile:
Dam* I’m even beginning to convince myself to avoid me at all costs.
12/24/12: I have a confession to make. :* The HD 2010 after reliability improvements conducted by me is one helluva torch. Bone stock, not so much. But with a little TLC this sucker really performs. Especially on 26650’s. So Lumatic’s previous two-thumbs down has now been changed to 1 1/2 thumbs up. I just wish there was more consistency between the brands making ’em. When that happens it’ll get 2 thumbs up and maybe even a big toe. Personally I’m gonna hold out for a fire-sale by FandyFire. Then I’ll prolly buy 14 more of ’em. If any of you hear of a great FandyFire sale please PM me. Elba Island is still getting the internet btw. :
12/27/12: Btw I’m beginning to think Rufusbduck is quite prolly a flashlight creative genius. I mean OTOH he could be a complete moron at everything else. I dunno. Well it does appear he can sorta type so prolly not a complete moron at everything else. It’s possible we have a few idiot savants on here like Rainman too. I’d drop some specific names like Scaru but I don’t think he’d appreciate it. Anyhow I believe he’s still my agent so I have to run everything through him that’s potentially controversial. Although I have heard other’s want the job to get a cut in the action. In any case, I have to keep my pubic image intact ya know so a pubic agent is impotent these days. Elba is pretty cold this time of year fyi. Thanks for wasting your time reading this btw. Now where was I………………oh yes, I was trying to garner more self-possessed desperate pubic attention.
12/27/12: I’m baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!! Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ha ha ha!!!
You all thought you could beat Lumatic at his own game. Can’t do it, baby. Can’t touch this. Bwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahhahaha ha ha !!!
Btw it helps to know the right peeps in the biz, connections, and just savvy, baby, savvy. So savvy this!..…………………
Ps. It looks like it’s a tite thread-impressive-race between Rufusbduck and Scaru so far. Lot’s o’ time left tho’. But you other guys better get on the stick and do some amazing work like these two! Hah! Taint gonna be eezy boys. Taint gonna be eezy.
12/28/12: I had a very satisfying lunch yesterday at Costcoooooooooooo. And no it wasn’t at their Food Court either. It was from just walking around the warehouse munching on all the free samples. Well ya know it also helps when ya go back for 2nd’s and turds. I mean a couple of the old-gals there cookin’ up jazz started to give me a “WTF” look after I had my turd free-tamale sample in the last 5 minutes. :cowboy_hat_face: Plus tho’ I flirt with ‘em a bit, ya know butter em’ up like us guys did back in High School. “My, ya look quite ravishing there slaving over that hot skillet. (She’s typically like maybe pushing 85). Mind if I sample your next batch? I’ll wait. You’re the best one here today ya know.” Not one to be shy am I. :bigsmile:
So as I was trekking about in the shopping cart with by this time sample-stains amply covering my shirt, it dawned on me that a person could literally buy a Costcoooooooooo membership card for $50/year and exist quite physically-well by just frequenting the joint 3 x day. Plus ya get walking exercise. I mean you could prolly get well over the requisite calorie-intake needed to survive and then some. I mean I’m figuring a Costcoooooooooooooo card even if ya never actually buy anything is basically better than one of those SNAP Cards by a long-shot. And by the looks of some of those frequently-seen tailgaitin’ tubbies rolling around in their Lord Humongous store-free-to-ride 3-wheel-electro-scooters my observation is quite accurate here.
Btw, I’m kinda looking for a new agent. The present one appears to be on the verge of flaking-out and taking stuff too seriously. ‘Course a main prerequisite for being my pubic agent or any pubic-image agent for that matter is that ya must have thick skin, not get crabby, and most definitely not give a sh*t about what others say or imply. Especially here. Now he wants me to start posting. Well, c’mon. Ya gotta know that isn’t the purpose here, right? Btw, what is the purpose? Ok, anyway. That plus he has been posting a lot lately which is good so I figure he has prolly better things to do than act as an intermediary between the likes of Texaspyromaniac and moi. Since he didn’t get commission during the last failed bribe attempt I figure he’s getting antsy. He’s kinda a hoarder tho’ he won’t admit it. Besides that diaper looks like its got a really full load in there. I think he has his hands preoccupied with that alone much less building lume-blasters. Blue Boy has been going crazy too with his new Digital Brownie camera. OTOH If he wins the Lumatic Award For Flashlight Excellence (LAFFE) he’ll prolly start sayin’ nice things about me for a change. Fat chance in h*ll that’ll ever happen. :*
Speakin’ of Costcooooooooooooo, or as I call it, Cashgooooooooooooooooooooo, ’cause a lot of my cash goes there, they still had some of the Coast HP550’s left. Maybe 20 lites at most. So they’re going. It’s a helluva lite. If ya don’t already got one, get one. Can’t say I never told ya to.
And here’s a shout-out to our great admin-moderator Sb for fixing this thread so it werks. He’s the best most patient moderator ever I think, ya know. And I’ve been around more than a few as*wipe meddling moderators in my web lifetime lemme tell ya. We’re dam* lucky we got him. I think we all outta pitch-in and get him something someday, ya know? :bigsmile:
Btw, thanks for stopping by and wasting your time. So go back to sleep. Let’s hope the new year starts off better than how this one ended with useless distracting crappola like my stuff. Light on, brother! 8)
12/28/12: Can ya believe this guy? He’s just messin’ around too. Imagine if he got real serious. He’s like an O-L protege on steroids already. I feel like a mega-lumetard compared to him. A ‘course that doesn’t mean much relatively speakin’ to most everyone else here. H)
Well, let's see, you're both fictional characters, you both give gifts to little children (and old people), you both play with elves and Reindeer (I'm just guessing you do, from some of your posts).
