Poll: Should We Do Away With Anonymous Rude Marks?

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teacher
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SubSailorVet wrote:
teacher wrote:
No “offense” taken here. It was dished out to you & you responded (rather reserved I thought) …. that is all I saw.

Teacher, you have always been very amicable and friendly to me. I appreciate that! I do call things how I see them and never sugar coat my words. If I wasn’t reserved here I would have been kicked out long ago. I spent most of my working life in many supervisory positions, in the Navy I was a very young leader and made rank faster than normal because of my ways, one was telling my leaders how things really were, the hard truth and not telling them what weaklings think they want to hear. In the restaurant and nightclub business I had to get my point across to people with thick hard skulls, in IT I was the director of technology for a small but very busy hospital and had a few hundred “users” that were a buncha dumb@#*€¥!, it was hard but I did talk to the nurses gently, the arrogant doctors not so much. when I was a fugitive recovery agent I used strong language not because I liked it, because that is the only language scumbag degenerate filthy criminal sh¥&#€*?s understand. Well that and a nightstick across the skull or stun gun at the base of the neck gets your point across most of the time. Putting big bad tough guys in pink handcuffs and pink leg shackles pisses them off and takes away their bad attitude most of the time. Ha! But dealing with the hard criminals I discovered using respect not kissing their butt worked most of the time. Treating a criminal gently was hard to do because they were scumbags, but respect went a long way and they cooperated when I was respectful. If respect didn’t work, I used different methods, but they all eventually gave in and went to jail and I got paid. This is the only forum I’ve been where profanity is not allowed. It is a good idea, and the rude button lets SB know who gave it. I wonder if it was public knowledge who gave it how that would go??? What do you think?
Well said SSV. Thumbs Up … It sounds as though you have had a variety of experience also. Wink

It was actually discussed earlier in this thread to make the giver if the rude mark public. But it was decided that would not work.

I & a few others felt different….. BUT, this is SB’s house & his rules. And that also works fine with me, cause I think he does a fantastic job!!

So onward we go……. Smile

Thanks also for the kind words. You just seem like a straight forward person to me. I like as well as respect that.

You never know how a horse will pull until you hook him up to a heavy load./"Bear" Bryant 

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cabfrank
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Straight forward is good. Straight forward and polite is even better.

unknown00101
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teacher wrote:
Oh it is a heck of a lot better than it was right before the rude system was implemented. No doubt about that.

Interesting… I was under the impression that the person giving the rude mark could not be identified. From what you say TK looks like I was mis-informed. Smile


I believe SB posted that in the original rudeness thread: http://budgetlightforum.com/node/47282

Anonymous to us, revealed to SB so that he can deal with people who abuse it.

Edit: SB responded to this thread earlier and said the same here: http://budgetlightforum.com/comment/1186564#comment-1186564

teacher
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unknown00101 wrote:
teacher wrote:
Oh it is a heck of a lot better than it was right before the rude system was implemented. No doubt about that.

Interesting… I was under the impression that the person giving the rude mark could not be identified. From what you say TK looks like I was mis-informed. Smile

I believe SB posted that in the original rudeness thread: http://budgetlightforum.com/node/47282

Anonymous to us, revealed to SB so that he can deal with people who abuse it.

Probably did… Correction… seems he did. I’m just getting old(er) & forgetful it seems Big Smile
What was it someone called it/said they had, in another thread? CRS ???
Anyway…
I think I have the beginning of early onset (yeah, 65 is early.. Wink ) CRS. Shocked

Can’t Remember Stuff….. Big Smile (like I once could).
Either way, it is what it is; whether I remember it or not.
But…….. I am very glad he can. Wink

You never know how a horse will pull until you hook him up to a heavy load./"Bear" Bryant 

 .................................. "Slow is Smooth, Smooth is Fast" ...................................

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Enderman
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SubSailorVet wrote:
I call it how I see it and don’t sugar coat what I say. Sorry if I offended anyone.

That’s what I used to do, until people on this forum got very upset with me Big Smile
hIKARInoob
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Enderman wrote:
SubSailorVet wrote:
I call it how I see it and don’t sugar coat what I say. Sorry if I offended anyone.
That’s what I used to do, until people on this forum got very upset with me Big Smile

Anything sugar is not so popular these days. Less sugar, more exercise… You know… Silly

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hIKARInoob wrote:
Enderman wrote:
SubSailorVet wrote:
I call it how I see it and don’t sugar coat what I say. Sorry if I offended anyone.
That’s what I used to do, until people on this forum got very upset with me Big Smile

Anything sugar is not so popular these days. Less sugar, more exercise… You know… Silly


Well… some people seem to be sugar addicts. But, SB has already said numerous times since the Rude! system was implemented, that it is working as he intended and there is no large scale abuse. And, although I don’t like getting Rude! points (especially since I don’t think I deserve them) the truth is that the Rude! system is more of a soft reminder to us of how our words are received here. The real enforcement is handled directly by SB, as it always has been. And he’s really good at it, IMHO. This is the best forum I’ve ever participated in!

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teacher wrote:
Oh it is a heck of a lot better than it was right before the rude system was implemented. No doubt about that.

Interesting… I was under the impression that the person giving the rude mark could not be identified. From what you say TK looks like I was mis-informed. Smile

I believe no one but sb can see who is making the rude reports. Which I believe is the beauty of the system. Anyone can “complain” about a post and not be identified by the general membership. Being able to ID the complainant by members at large, especially the person being reported, will too often lead to unwarranted recriminations against by the offender. And then everything escalates into forum hell, which is what we’re trying to avoid or prevent. As sb mentioned too, our rude reports helps him sort out whether something he finds possibly offensive is offensive to the general membership.

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Speed4goal wrote:
I think you should be able to see who clicks rude against you.

Some people abuse it and mark post that arnt even rude because they may not like someone. Make people a little more accountable for clicking it.

If something is rude then ya click away. But shouldn’t ve able to hide and do it secretly.

+1

Two-way “policing” should help balance things out.

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I recently learned that some people think I’m kind of scary. So… it’s probably good that there’s a way for people to anonymously tell me I crossed a line. They might not do anything at all if it wasn’t anonymous.

As for calling it like one sees it, and not sugar-coating words, it sounds awfully close to being rude on purpose and being proud of it. Escalating by choice… which is kind of why the ‘rude’ button exists. Too many people were doing that, and it quickly turned into a dumpster fire.

As mentioned a few posts ago, “respect went a long way and they cooperated when I was respectful” is typically a better default style. It helps people interact as rational agents instead of falling back on old primal habits which haven’t really evolved away yet.

raccoon city
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ToyKeeper wrote:

As for calling it like one sees it, and not sugar-coating words, it sounds awfully close to being rude on purpose and being proud of it. Escalating by choice… which is kind of why the ‘rude’ button exists. Too many people were doing that, and it quickly turned into a dumpster fire.

As mentioned a few posts ago, “respect went a long way and they cooperated when I was respectful” is typically a better default style. It helps people interact as rational agents instead of falling back on old primal habits which haven’t really evolved away yet.

Well said!

ToyKeeper wrote:

I recently learned that some people think I’m kind of scary. So… it’s probably good that there’s a way for people to anonymously tell me I crossed a line. They might not do anything at all if it wasn’t anonymous.

I know you're a goddess and all, but I don't find you scary.

Also, I don't remember you ever crossing the rudeness line.

Keep up the good work!

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Read this somewhere

“A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect”

SB set the boundaries, we should respect them, as we are in his house Innocent

Cheers David

Nothing to see here folks, move along...

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raccoon city wrote:
I don’t remember you ever crossing the rudeness line.

You should see the first draft of my posts. Silly

teacher
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MtnDon wrote:

I believe no one but sb can see who is making the rude reports.
Yep… I think you are correct. Kinda what we figured out HERE ….. Thumbs Up

You never know how a horse will pull until you hook him up to a heavy load./"Bear" Bryant 

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Ronin42
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ToyKeeper wrote:
raccoon city wrote:
I don’t remember you ever crossing the rudeness line.

You should see the first draft of my posts. Silly

but we didn’t and thats the point.

I bet mister “scary” just has a crush.

take it as a complement and move on.

(“It’s good that most people can’t remember their previous lives. Otherwise
things would be a lot more complicated than they already are.”
Ajaan Lee Dhammadharo)

raccoon city
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Ronin42 wrote:

I bet mister "scary" just has a crush.

take it as a complement and move on.

I admire women in general (and am sorry for making fun of Greta), but it's hard to have a crush on someone that I haven't seen.  ;)

Franz
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I think this thread is going out of rails like another the old one, I did will comment, but lets this useless discussion dies!

Ronin42 wrote:
ToyKeeper wrote:
raccoon city wrote:
I don’t remember you ever crossing the rudeness line.

You should see the first draft of my posts. Silly

but we didn’t and thats the point.

I bet mister “scary” just has a crush.

take it as a complement and move on.

So, I’ve tried not……I’ve tried SO hard to not laugh but its stronger than me

-500 paragons points

teacher
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ToyKeeper wrote:
I recently learned that some people think I’m kind of scary.
Forgive me…. but that is just downright funny. Smile
The only way I can possibly picture that happening is if a new person started out reading one of your ‘other world’ (for lack of a better word) posts. I can imagine that could possibly give a person not familiar with you pause.
But they would most likely recover real fast…… Big Smile

As far as being straight forward. Probably everyone has a different definition of that, and that is just fine. To me a straight forward person is being polite. I know exactly where they stand & to me that is a good thing. No guess work involved & usually no surprises or worries of a ‘knife in the back’ from that person. I am speaking of life in general here… certainly not just BLF.

I do think that either extreme of ‘telling it like it is’ most usually is not the best thing. Although, as SubSailorVet mentioned; there is a time for extremes also.
Sadly, in life; ruthless extremes are all a few people understand. But even with those people, once you have their attention; things usually go much smoother & low key.

And go to the extreme of ‘sugar coating’ something to the extreme is pretty much just sickening as well as confusing…. to me anyway.

Here on BLF, an internet forum; neither extreme is very, very, rarely called for.
Though the boundaries of those extremes vary from person to person.

I think here on BLF it works pretty good for the most part.

You never know how a horse will pull until you hook him up to a heavy load./"Bear" Bryant 

 .................................. "Slow is Smooth, Smooth is Fast" ...................................

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raccoon city wrote:

Pulsar wrote:

Speaking of rude, what happened to the please dont quote quote thread?


Mr. Admin closed the thread and made it so that only the OP was visible.


Yeah, unfortunately I had to close it down, those quote mazes were absolutely killing the server with all the CPU cycles, and I was already having a problem with excessive server load around that time period. Sorry to rain on the parade, that was admittedly a funny thread.

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teacher
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No apology necessary…. it was best that one got laid to rest for whatever reason…. Big Smile

You never know how a horse will pull until you hook him up to a heavy load./"Bear" Bryant 

 .................................. "Slow is Smooth, Smooth is Fast" ...................................

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teacher wrote:
one of your ‘other world’ (for lack of a better word) posts

Hrrmph. Nobody ever believes me.

You probably even think I made up that story about when a bunch of us old-world deities put aside our differences to celebrate the Earth’s 6000th birthday, complete with 6000 candles on the cake. October 23, 1997, just as Bishop Ussher calculated. But that’s okay, I found my pictures this time. Took a while since it was before any of us had digital cameras.

The cake was a little, um, warm… but still edible. It was nicely protected under a layer of freshly-melted wax.

Then we followed that up with an Earth piñata. Good times.

At first we did this much more often, breaking a simulacrum of the world every century to get out frustrations and help everyone avoid breaking the real one… but now that we’ve all calmed down a bit it’s only once per millenia for old times’ sake.

Not sure if it’ll happen next time. After putting 6000 candles on the cake one at a time, even shaving the wax down to make them narrow enough to fit, Hestia swore never again. But maybe she’ll change her mind in the next 980 years. She does, after all, like to brag about being a sexy shoeless god of cooking… and she’s honestly kind of a pushover.

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Franz wrote:
I think this thread is going out of rails

Sorry, it’s a bad habit.

We should probably get back to talking about shiny things. I like shiny things.

teacher
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No TK… I have never been a doubter of you….. after I read a few of your posts & the replys I knew you were on the level. Wink ..
Just saying possibly a new person might need the same ‘initiation period’…. depending on which post of yours they read first. Big Smile
But either way, they are bound to soon come to the same conclusion I did!
You are A-OK….. Wink

That is an amazing amount of candles on that cake…….. Thumbs Up
I bet it did have a bit of a ‘toasty wax’ flavor.

You never know how a horse will pull until you hook him up to a heavy load./"Bear" Bryant 

 .................................. "Slow is Smooth, Smooth is Fast" ...................................

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Franz
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ToyKeeper wrote:
Franz wrote:
I think this thread is going out of rails

Sorry, it’s a bad habit.

We should probably get back to talking about shiny things. I like shiny things.

Ow thats right, shiny things……

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YYOKMUTTDdA

MtnDon
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TK, Wow! I’ve done 100 candles and thought it was quite the blaze. Hard to imagine 6000.

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Looks like she setting a piece of shag carpet on fire

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As a reminder for those new to the operation of the rule, the button label is “rude” but that’s not the only rule violation that the button is used to point out.
You know how to look this stuff up — the site rules link is just below the upper left corner of every page.

Someone may be perfectly polite and charming and still be stepping on toes — I’ve heard that called a “wide load” personality,
it’s a kind of approach to conversation that “uses both lanes of the highway” or “sucks all the oxygen out of the room” or “Foghorn Leghorn.”

The button could be labeled “please back off, 11th Commandment violation in progress”

You know the 11th Commandment?
It’s “You do too know what I mean.”

(And if you think this is pointed at you, bless your heart, it’s meant to describe who I’ve been and have to watch for being. Been there done that regretted it.)

Remember Rule 9.

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Boy there are some touchy members,I just noticed I got a “rude” a week ago Big Smile
For this

pommie wrote:
Are you a ‘them’ or are you an us

Your choice Silly

Cheers David


link to post.

Maybe it was because I gave them a choice and they couldn’t handle it Crazy

Nothing to see here folks, move along...

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pommie wrote:
Boy there are some touchy members,I just noticed I got a “rude” a week ago Big Smile
For this
pommie wrote:
Are you a ‘them’ or are you an us

Your choice Silly

Cheers David


link to post.

Maybe it was because I gave them a choice and they couldn’t handle it Crazy

Thats very rude for me, that first emoticon gave a huge fear in me and you post twice……

You are REALLY evil

Enderman
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Can people please stop bumping this thread again and again every time they get a rude mark?
If you get a rude point, just deal with it, it goes away after 1 day.

There is no point in making a post “haha someone thought this was rude {insert not-rude thing here}” looking for justification.
This is like the sixth time I see someone make a post complaining about getting a rude point for something that is not really rude.

Seriously, it’s not a big deal, just move on.

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