The Daily Joke Thread

Three blondes go for a walk in the woods, where they see some tracks on the ground

"It's a deer" the first says, confidently

"No, they're too big for deer. It's got to be an elk." disagrees the second

"Elk? Look at the size of those tracks. Those are MOOSE tracks!" cries the third.

They were still arguing when the train hit them.


So a baby seal walks into a club...

Hear about the blonde lesbian ?

She likes men .

A priest , a rabbi , and a minister walk into a bar .

The bartender looks up and says " What is this , a joke ? "

Two Irishmen were walking out of a bar...

Love it .

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral ?

One less drunk .

A seal goes to a bar.

The bartender asks: What do you want to drink?

The seal says: " Anything but Canadian Club!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "hey, fella, why the long face?".

Knock, Knock.

Who's there?


Dave who?

Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

What does a hurricane and a red-neck divorce have in common?

No matter what, somebody's gonna lose a trailer.