A paraphrase of the real quote….

‘He who gives up freedom for safety deserves neither’

It’s my signature.

Old Quote.
Why do it today when you can do it tomorrow.

My quote.
If you do it today and enjoy it, you can do it again tomorrow.

Wow, where to start. I have quite a few favourite quotes and mottos… let’s see…

If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.
(Bodybuilding/fitness motivation – if you’re not getting results, you need to do something differently. Doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result is the definition of insanity!)

Bessie Braddock: “Sir, you are drunk.”
Churchill: “Madam, you are ugly. In the morning, I shall be sober.”
(Hahaha, classic Churchill!)

If you are going through hell… keep going!
(Another Churchill quote? Not 100% sure if that’s legit.)

If you judge a goldfish by it’s ability to climb a tree, it will spend it’s whole life believing it’s stupid.
(Probably paraphrased a bit… I think it’s a quote from Einstein.)

Not exactly a quote, but I really like this:

Picasso was in a park when a woman approached him and asked him to draw a portrait of her. Picasso agreed and quickly sketches her. After handing the sketch to her, she is pleased with the likeness and asks how much she owed to him. Picasso replies $5,000. The woman screamed, “but it took you only five minutes!” “No, Madam, it took me all my life”, replied Picasso.

“If you’re not a liberal by 20, you have no heart. If not conservative by 40, you have no brain” – Churchill

“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear” – Mark Twain

“I never think of the future, it comes soon enough” – Einstein

“Drinking rum before noon does not make me an alcoholic, it makes me a pirate.” – T-shirt at a Jimmy Buffet concert

what didn’t kill you the first time usually will try it again next time

“Do or do not…there is no try” ~Yoda

"I want to look him straight in the eye and tell him what a cheap, lying, no good, rotten, four flushing, snake licking, dirt eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood sucking, dog kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat assed, bug eyed, stiff legged, spotty lipped, worm headed, sack of monkey shit he is!!!

Halleluah!! Holy shit!! Where's the Tylenol??"

Chevy Chase’s Rant from "Christmas Vacation"

A common mistake people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

Douglas Adams, 1992

Imagination is more important than knowledge ~ Albert Einstein

I agree with this. Most inventions in history are a product of creative minds.

“Free advice is worth exactly what you pay for it.”

Disclaimer: This is not one of my favorite quotes. It is a cautionary tale.

Haha!  Some of these were really great!

Here is one...

"Build a man a fire and you keep him warm for a day.  Set that man on fire and he'll be warm the rest of his life."

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@rojos: "Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple."  - Barry Switzer

I use that one all the time when describing my boss.

@Jack: "I want to look him straight in the eye and tell him what a cheap, lying, no good, rotten, four flushing, snake licking, dirt eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood sucking, dog kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat assed, bug eyed, stiff legged, spotty lipped, worm headed, sack of monkey shit he is!!!

Halleluah!! Holy shit!! Where's the Tylenol??"

One of my all time favorites!

@Steve: "Why do it today when you can do it tomorrow."

My lifetime motto!

A Leopard can't change his spots - My Grandmother - meaning people don't change on the inside, what you really are is what you really are, even when you try to hide it.

“If you buy this car and it breaks into two pieces, I guarantee you that you own both pieces.”

Caveat emptor (Let the buyer beware).

The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is.

Winston Churchill

I am prone to add, laying in front of you like a big steaming turd.

"Just do it" - Nike 

Ladies and gentlemen, I'll be brief. The issue here is not whether we broke a few rules, or took a few liberties with our female party guests - we did. But you can't hold a whole fraternity responsible for the behavior of a few, sick twisted individuals. For if you do, then shouldn't we blame the whole fraternity system? And if the whole fraternity system is guilty, then isn't this an indictment of our educational institutions in general? I put it to you, Greg - isn't this an indictment of our entire American society? Well, you can do whatever you want to us, but we're not going to sit here and listen to you badmouth the United States of America. Gentlemen!

Otter , Animal House 1978

They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.

" I've never seen so many men wasted so badly . "

Blondie ( surveying Civil War carnage )

 The Good , The Bad , And the Ugly

 " If you don't learn something new every day , you're going backwards , because you sure as hell forget something every day ."

JacktheClipper

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

Half the lies they tell about me aren’t true.

You can observe a lot by just watching.

It’s like deja-vu, all over again.

Nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded.

If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.

Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.

“Reports of my clown related demise…have been greatly exaggerated”
Bort

"WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP AND GIVE EVERYONE A CHANCE TO LIKE YOU!"

(don't know who came up with that one...)

My Pop often said:

“If we had some ham, we could have some ham and eggs, if we had some eggs.”

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the tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives -**

Stuff I remember my father saying when I was growing up.

The way to be seen is to stand up.

The way to be heard is to speak up.

The way to be appreciated is to shut up.

This is a democratic dictatorship, everyone gets a vote but mine is the only one that counts.

Don't let the door slam you in the ass on the way out.

The large print giveth and the small print taketh away.

-Tom Waits

Example

860 Lumens (for 3 minutes)

Pinetreebbs wrote:

My Pop often said: "If we had some ham, we could have some ham and eggs, if we had some eggs."

That reminds me of something my grandpop once said to me as he paused on the steps one night... "I'm headin' up stairs now to f#ck your grandma".  Still brings a tear to my eye.

Telman2 wrote:

Don't let the door slam you in the ass on the way out.

I will always remember my father yelling "shit or get off the pot!" when he'd be driving on the highway behind some jackass in the passing lane who was driving slow. Fond memory indeed!  :bigsmile:

My grandfather had many wise snippets…..none of which are appropriate for sharing publicly >.>