Required reading if you want to be like Chuck Norris.
The local variant is “Spikkin a me ir chawin’ a brick.” Or translated: “Are you speaking to me or chewing on a brick? Either way you are about to lose your teeth.”
i’m pretty sure the paragraph with the book’s description can be used by the attorney to get you 4 extra years in prison…. just make sure to delete your browser’s history before going for a walk with your flashlight… you never know 
Not in Texas.