How do you deal with anger?

[fluke]

Tramadol works for me

[xevious (Gary)]

@dorpmuller

@xevious

@Rexlion

I’m not an angry person 99% of the time. But if something frustrating or pain-inducing occurs and I feel angry, I vocalize the anger (assuming I’m not in front of other people, besides my wife who is used to hearing it) and let it out, and a minute later I’m no longer feeling angry.

The one Achilles heel I still have within me is children. If I see an adult male abusing a child, I find it hard to contain the rage I feel for the abusive parent. It’s the age old bully association from childhood.

I’m like that with dogs. I really love them… if I ever saw someone abusing one God knows what I’d do. My wife knows full well that our dogs are the one thing I’d go to jail for. Anybody messes with them, they die, period. Slowly and inexquisite pain.

I can definitely appreciate that. I grew up as a cat person but after getting to know a few dogs of friends, I find them to be such wonderful animals. They’re innocent & loving by nature—the mean ones are only due to nasty human owners/abusers.

[ToyKeeper]

@phouton

What if people refuse to leave you alone?

Then I’m usually just quiet until I have more energy… like a phone going into airplane mode when the battery is low.

When people read a book or watch a movie, they step into the role of the characters in that story. They see what those characters see, feel what they feel, and it’s almost like being there. The reader (or viewer) laughs and cries along with the characters in the story. But then close the book, or turn the movie off, and within seconds, the person’s mind is somewhere else entirely, unconcerned about what happened in the story. It was fun while it lasted, but it doesn’t really matter.

That’s also what much of daily life is like. When good things are happening, it’s fun. When bad things are happening, it’s like waiting for a bad movie to end.

@phouton

Do you get called a robot, accused of having no emotions, or of being uncaring?

Not really, since I usually pay attention to what others are feeling and try to help when appropriate. With no emotional turmoil happening inside, it’s generally not hard to notice other people’s social cues.

One downside is when people get so accustomed to you knowing what they’re thinking that they sometimes forget to say it out loud… and then they expect you to know it. Or when they want you to feel as strongly about something as they do, and the best you can offer is a faded mirror of their own feelings.

[Terry_Oregon]

@Terry Oregon

Trauma Releasing Exercises (TRE).

I wanted to mention, the instructional video for TRE has been released for free by the founder. You can try it out in your living room. The jist of this technique; these exercises activate the shaking/tremoring mechanism in the nervous system that occurs when we are traumatized, frightened or under stress (like public speaking). The belief, is that this shaking is the nervous system's innate way of recovering from stress/trauma - but we haven't historically understood the purpose of this shaking, and we tend to suppress it, keeping us stuck in fight/flight/freeze.

TRE® (Tension & Trauma Releasing Exercises): Full Instructions with Dr. David Berceli (OFFICIAL)

News coverage:

TRE on CTV News

[phouton]

ToyKeeper You sound like a good friend to have.

@ToyKeeper

With no emotional turmoil happening inside, it’s generally not hard to notice other people’s social cues.

Noticing cues may not be too hard, though harder for some than others, but interpreting what is noticed is altogether another story.

[dorpmuller]

@phouton

@ToyKeeper@ You sound like a good friend to have.

@ToyKeeper

With no emotional turmoil happening inside, it’s generally not hard to notice other people’s social cues.

Noticing cues may not be too hard, though harder for some than others, but interpreting what is noticed is altogether another story.

The wiring for my perception of social cues was left out at the factory. I don't pick them up at all. (part of Asperger's) Consequently I ain't a social kinda guy.

[power911]

Most of my anger comes from my work so… I take a day off or two since I don’t use my annual leaves

[Deputy_Dog]

I don’t think anger is a bad thing, it’s a normal human emotion. So, I look at the causes of anger and try to deal with them.

[lampliter]

I write poetry.
I can’t publish it on this forum.
It would piss way to many people off.

[everydaysurvivalgear]

This song describes my head most of the time.

[phouton]

@dorpmuller

@phouton

ToyKeeper You sound like a good friend to have.

@ToyKeeper

With no emotional turmoil happening inside, it’s generally not hard to notice other people’s social cues.

Noticing cues may not be too hard, though harder for some than others, but interpreting what is noticed is altogether another story.

The wiring for my perception of social cues was left out at the factory. I don’t pick them up at all. (part of Asperger’s) Consequently I ain’t a social kinda guy.

And does that make you angry? :smiling_imp: Joking…

Are you sure you don’t perceive the cues at all (possible), or that you don’t recognize what to do with them? People with autism or Asperger’s are often very observant, more so than neurotypical folks at least in certain areas, so I think the latter is a good possibility in many cases.

Asperger syndrome | Social interaction

The cognitive ability of children with AS often allows them to articulate social norms in a laboratory context, where they may be able to show a theoretical understanding of other people’s emotions; however, they typically have difficulty acting on this knowledge in fluid, real-life situations. People with AS may analyze and distill their observations of social interaction into rigid behavioral guidelines and apply these rules in awkward ways, such as forced eye contact, resulting in a demeanor that appears rigid or socially naïve.

[dorpmuller]

@phouton

@dorpmuller

@phouton

@ToyKeeper@ You sound like a good friend to have.

@ToyKeeper

With no emotional turmoil happening inside, it’s generally not hard to notice other people’s social cues.

Noticing cues may not be too hard, though harder for some than others, but interpreting what is noticed is altogether another story.

The wiring for my perception of social cues was left out at the factory. I don't pick them up at all. (part of Asperger's) Consequently I ain't a social kinda guy.

And does that make you angry? :smiling_imp: Joking… Are you sure you don’t perceive the cues at all (possible), or that you don’t recognize what to do with them? People with autism or Asperger’s are often very observant, more so than neurotypical folks at least in certain areas, so I think the latter is a good possibility in many cases. Asperger syndrome - Wikipedia

The cognitive ability of children with AS often allows them to articulate social norms in a laboratory context, where they may be able to show a theoretical understanding of other people’s emotions; however, they typically have difficulty acting on this knowledge in fluid, real-life situations. People with AS may analyze and distill their observations of social interaction into rigid behavioral guidelines and apply these rules in awkward ways, such as forced eye contact, resulting in a demeanor that appears rigid or socially naïve.

No, I *really* don't "get it." That part is completely missing. Go figure, because I am observant and God knows I hyperfocus... look at the flashlight obsession, which it is. Any more it's not my choice to be social, except those in the rooms of AA, because that saved my life. Now, when it comes to dogs it's completely opposite. Sometimes I can tell what's going on with them just by a glance. Get me around dogs and the very best parts of my personality come out.

[Rexlion]

Rage is a serious thing, and if you slip and don’t control it some day, you might cause irreparable harm to someone (and to your own life and future). Have you ever asked God to help you overcome the inclination? He is the source of real love and true peace.

Thinking back to my childhood, I did tend toward extreme fits of anger when I was young. But I read Bible verses on the subject and I prayed for help, and I’m much, much less prone to that kind of anger now. And like I wrote before, when I do get anger, I might cuss and yell for a minute or two to let out the emotion, and then it’s over.