Light Poetry

A fellow named Jack the Clipper

(Don't confuse him with Jack the Ripper)

Had so many lights

That they kept him up nights

Trying to shine the Big Dipper

We have many shills on the forum

There aren't many here who adore them

It's what they do best

To bother the rest

of the members who'd rather destroy them.


My Solarforce crew is enormous

From weak to the brightest performer

L2P is the bomb

My M8 is real long

But a 502B is a boner.


I like Shadow flashlights, I do

My JM07 is new

It likes a King Kong

That lasts all the night long

Big ass monkey name, it is too cool.


oh how i love my c8

beaming the sky i stay up too late

id better get to bed

but i read BLF instead

tired morning will be my fate.


Careful , though , it's addictive .

I limericked a couple of customers today , and they loved it .

Not the sort of encouragement I really need , because it will just throw gas on the fire.

I have always loved a good joke

And my friends I just can't help but poke

Now I sit and I rhyme

Nearly all of the time

Knowing all the good poets died broke

We Love Lumens and Lux

We Know Dimmer Light Sucks

A Flood or a Spot

They all get us hot

We just gotta find the Bucks


This looks like a "throw done"! Battle of the "Limericks". This is good stuff!

Keith (Who ain"t got time to rhyme) That"s all from me.

Keith says that he can't write a rhyme
He knows 'cause he tried it one time
He got so frustrated
Himself he berated
For creating a limerical crime

But old Keith was too busy to rhyme

He said "Sorry, I don't have the time"

But his buddiesl persuaded

And he became accoladed

For his efforts turned out just sublime! H)

In fact Keith wasn't just good, he was great!

And BLF-ers could hardly wait

For the next lovely poem

That Keith wanted to show 'em

But on Jack it was starting to grate!

"Who's this Keith?!" asked Jack in a temper

"I'M the poet round here, just remember!

Keith couldn't out-rhyme me

Just you wait and see

If I gave him from now till December!" :p

Now, Keith heard of Jack's challenge and smiled

"It'll be like taking candy away from a child!"

"Oh yeah?" snarled Jack

"You bet!" Keith sneered back

You can tell, they were both pretty wild! |(

But at this point sb interjected

He'd been watching, as might be expected

"Now look, gentlemen

Just shake hands and be friends!"

A suggestion that both men accepted :)

Said Jack "How about we collaborate?

Nothing too big or elaborate"

Keith said "Shake my hand

Before we get banned!"

And they both settled down to confabulate :love:

Their work was so good that it sold

They were literally rolling in gold! $)

Budget lights began to bore 'em

So they joined CandlePowerForums

And their Sipiks began to grow mold

At first Jack and Keith both felt better

They bought Surefires, and a pair of Elzettas

But their joy didn't last

'Cause they couldn't hide their past

And they drew the attention of Greta! J)

It began quite innocently one day

When one of them linked to a SkyRay :O

Down came a mod

Who thought he was god

And turned our boys' blue skies to gray

"We're sorry!" they said, very contrite

"Our offense was ever so slight!"

"You question my law?!"

Gasped Greta in awe

"Banned for life! Get out of my sight!"

"CPF is just horrid!" said Jack

Keith agreed, "And the future looks black!

I preferred BLF

We should never have left

I really think we should go back!"

So they logged in, and with great delight

Followed O-L as he modded a Maglite

ILF was still splurging

"Buy A SF!" Foy was urging

Ah, the lovely familiar old site!

They agreed that here they'd remain

And that to leave BLF was insane!

"Here's where we belong!"

"Hey, that would make a great song!"

Now lads, let's not go there again.. ;)

OMG! You guys are slaying me!

OMG! Too funny AND too good!!! I think you just stole Jack's crown from him irrevocably.

Those two made me bust out laughing at work!

This is the Lliad of the BLF prose, an epic account of those who rose.


When you got up this morning, did you think your work would be compared to Homer's?


the other Homer. H)

I just fell head over heels in like with you , man .

A truly funny and epic homage .

Damn impressive , sir.

Edit : Having read through your poem again -

Really damn impressive .

Thanks guys. Jack, coming from yourself, that's praise indeed! Must be this place that inspires me

Cone, I've been compared to Homer all my life!

Something like " Light Poetry "

At this point , this thread has had so many contributions , that I feel the current title is too exclusive .

Especially after Lensman's tale .

Did you see that he blended Smiley icons into that ?

Brilliant .

Come on, for real? The Iliad and the Odyssey by the Greek poet Homer. You know, Homer, the screenwriter that wrote the script for the movie Troy. :glasses: Here is the short version from the great magazine Mental Floss.

You're busting my chops, right? I can't be the only guy here who has read the classics as a lad. Maybe it is just a Jersey thing since I was referencing this statement of Teej's, "This is the Iliad of the BLF prose, an epic account of those who rose." Which rhymed too, so nice touch, Teej.

Guys, being bright isn't just a positive attribute for flashlights.

I bet they know about this at CPF! Sorry, almost went a little to far there. I still hate those guys.

Oh, please...we are obviously referring to the more humorous Homer on purpose. You aren't the only educated person here. ;)